Tere pyar mein

Read this somewhere...

na to yaadon ko yaad rakhte hain,
na to sapno ko saath rakhte hain,
hum to bus unko yaad rakhte hain,
jo humein apne dil ke paas rakhte hain...

Pay it forward

Something really funny happened today.

I was at the corner of Eagle Wharf Road just about to start my bike when I heard a loud thud on the opposite side of the road. I turned back to see a girl, flat on the pavement, helplessly trying to stand up. The entire pavement was still covered with thick layer of snow from yeasterday's fall.

I ran across and pulled her up.

Then asked her, 'you ok?'. She nodded. 'Well then', I thought to myself and walked backed to my bike. And I was so proud at what I had done, that I dint even wait to hear her say 'thank you'. In fact, I dint even lift my head once to watch her going. I was so swollen. With pride, that is, as I said before.

I started my bike and went in the same direction the girl was walking. And then, it happened again. This time it was me.

I hadn't even covered about 10 meters, when my bike went over a hump, slipped and fell. Both, my bike and me. The ice was so slippery, I wasn't getting a proper grip anywhere to hold on. And on top of that, I had my right leg stuck under the bike. I couldn't move a bit. I knew the girl was walking towards me. But at that point of time I just wanted to get the bike up somehow.

Then something really surprising happened. Another girl who saw me fall ran towards me, almost slipping twice herself, calling out, 'are you alright?'. When she saw my plight, tried pulling me up first. But then I was stuck. She tried to life the bike then, but was too heavy for her. I couldn't help her myself.

Finally another biker who was right behind me, got down and came forward. Together they lifted my bike and helped me stand up. Well, all I could say was 'thank you so much for your kindness.'

Now, what struck me was that the whole 'paying-it-forward-process' happened just within the matter of 2 minutes and 10 meters.

Thinking about it I do find it really very funny, as I said in the beginning. Who says fun things don't happen in such cold weather conditions.

Definitely, may be...

The day before we parted, she looked at me and said, 'please don't make me wait forever, because I'd probably be foolish enough to actually do it.' And all I could do was to keep looking back at her.

You. Me. And us.

I think about you.
I think about me.
I think about us.
I am refreshed. Happy. And inspired.

On aspirations...

If you really aspire to achieve something, and yet, if it seems unattainable, then just let it be. You will soon find your inner being getting attracted towards it. And in turn, making it happen for you. Very soon.

On courting unhappiness...

"An unhappy home life can trick you into thinking you're in love. The files of marriage counselors are filled with cases of younger people who fell in love and married when all they really wanted was to escape from pressures they considered unbearable. For example, a young girl who is constantly battling with her parents sees her boy friend as the rescuing knight in shining armor who will take her away from all this. She isn't in love- she just wants out."

Never marry for the wrong reasons. You just do not spoil your life but a lot of other people's life and happiness in the process.

On preparation...

The toughest and the longest part of your journey is making up your mind.

On Stability...

Today is the first day of the rest of my life. And your life. And everyone else's life. That's the only truth. And the only thing stable.

For your heart only...

It's terrible living here alone, without you by my side.
I hope you understand. And care.

I miss you, every single moment I spend here.
I hope you understand. And care.

Receding lines ...

"The closer I get, the more elusive you become.
The further you go, the clearer you become."

- 'Antaheen', 2009

Will I be soon crying at my own fate?! I don't know. I really don't know.

'......'

No words.

This is her. And this is me.

She cried when we spoke over the phone after our first fight.
She cried the first time we hugged.
She cried when I called her from the airport when I was leaving the country.
She cried when I first called her from London.
She cried the first time we did video chat over Skype.
Yesterday she cried when she saw me for the first time this month after she was back from hospital.
In fact, she cried each time I said anything good about her. Or, bad. Or sometimes, even just when I spoke.

Even though I hate to see her crying. Can I ever get to stop her from her outbursts? And can I even doing anything about it other than sheepishly and helplessly looking at her? This is her. And this is me. Do we need a reason why we love each other so much?

(Image courtesy: www.walkofthoughts.blogspot.com)

On fights and more.

Why do we really fight in a relationship? Is it because certain qualities of your partner irritate you? No. Because those are the ones that you fell for in the first place. Plain and simple. You can never hate them. You cease to have any more interest in them if those little imperfections disappear. Your imperfectly perfect partner would be boring.

Nobody is perfect. Everyone has their own share of imperfections. And when these imperfections complement each other, there is magic. That’s heavenly. That’s love.

For a relation to progress, it needs its own ups and downs. You try correcting. You give up. You fight. You sulk. And then, you realise your mistake. You apologize. No questions asked. No answers given. Not because either of you is wrong - but as they say, saying sorry relieves your soul. You thank God that you are imperfectly perfect together. You find yourself even more attached to each other. More than ever before.

Fights are actually little blessings. In a sound relationship, that is.

(Image courtesy: www.kootation.com)

On experiences.

I am glad for all my experiences in life so far. Sometimes I feel, if they hadn't been in and out of my life the way they have, would I ever appreciate what I have now.

Because of them I know how special and important you are to me. Someone once said, ‘There is a lot of beauty out there, which is true. But then what's more 'true' is the fact that when I look at you after looking at them, I find you even more beautiful!

Invaluable.

Now-a-days, I don’t even lament why I didn't meet you before. Not even a spare thought. But just be thankful to have you in my life. Every single day I find myself falling in love with you all over again. Even more. And much deeper. You are the only soul I have in this world who can love me like I want to be loved.

Don't give up. Not now, at least.

Please don't loose hope at this point.
Please hang in there for me.
Please don't give up.

Remember, I love you more than anything else.
And much more than you think I do.

Please get well soon.

Parents. As role models.

There is only so much one as a parent could do for their children. They, at most, can only set a good example. As for the rest, the children have to figure it out for themselves.

When words hurt...

When you have a confrontation with people who don’t know how exactly to talk. And more precisely, what to talk when.

• You accept their silly spiteful comments with a smile and say well, ‘if that's what you feel about me, fine with me buddy’. But to the ones with zero IQ take this as their personal victory and start looking for a meaner weapon to target you, with an assumption you are weak anyways.

• Or, you give them even more hurting reply every time they do it to you. But off course, your presence of mind should back you up - each time when a new form of shit comes out of their mouth.

• Or else, shut them up, by shutting them out totally. Why do you really need such friends who don’t care about your feelings?

• Best way, however, is to kill them.

Remember, your friend’s (or, for that matter anyone else’s) freedom to express ends at the tip of your nose.

Lambi Judaai...

Bichhdey abhi to hum, bas kal parso,
Jiyoongi main kaisey, is haal mein barson?
Maut na aayi, teri yaad kyon aayi,
Haaye, lambi judaai...

- Anand Bakshi, 'Hero', 1983





Roughly translated as:

We have been seperated just by a day or two,
How am I going to go on this way for years?
Death doesn't come; why, instead, do these memories of you?
Oh, this long seperation!

Missing you, little boy...

Ani, my little brother, will you ever believe me if I say I miss you? Ever? Well, believe it or not. But that's the truth. I wish it was all like before. And you still think of me as your best friend.

Personality. Of a human being.

Personality of a person is a combination of traits or characteristics that he or she has both inherited and been influenced over the years, owing to factors that are social, cultural and experienced basis.